10. Mormons abstain from coffee. Witnesses take frequent coffee breaks.
9. Brigham Young said to be “filled with the Spirit.” Judge Rutherford said to be “filled with spirits.”
8. Mormon Tabernacle Choir ---- Pre-recorded Kingdom songs
7. Joseph Smith discovered gold plates. Charles Russell discovered printing plates.
6. Mormons established BYU, a world-class university. Witnesses established Theocratic Ministry School.
5. Mormons urged to form close-knit family. Witnesses urged to shun family.
4. Mormons abstain from wine all year. Witnesses abstain from wine once a year.
3. Mormons have “Divine Revelation.” Witnesses have “New Light.” (Okay so that’s not actually a difference)
2. Prominent Mormons include doctors, lawyers and governors. Prominent Witnesses include janitors, pool cleaners and multi-level marketers.
1. Mormons don’t stand in front of deserted strip malls at 6:00 AM mutely displaying the Book of Mormon and try to convince you they’re “preaching.”